From Soul-Eating Rot to Life-Giving Fertilizer

A few nights ago, Shelle sent me this article and asked if “Neglect” was based on what it describes. It is uncanny (and disturbing) that this is the second news piece a friend reads, which reminds her of my short tale. The first one was shared by Gina. Sadly, the strange part is not that a parent is capable of such atrocity—we see this kind of horror more and more these days—the weirdness comes from the fact that I wrote the story a long time before knowing either case had taken place in our reality.

The articles left me so angry at the women that I couldn’t sleep. So I did what I do best for my heart and me in this kind of situation: wrote myself some therapy, tentatively titled, “Light and Dark on Neglect”. I will share it with you in a few days.

Why am I posting this, if I’m not ready to show you the new tale? Well, because someone just told me that “people are born with their destinies burned in their souls.” I believe that statement is a load of ill-digested horseshit, so I wanted to say a thing (or three) about the power of choice and the self-crafting of tomorrows: we can’t dictate what happens to us or in what order it might occur, but we have the power to choose how we react to these things. And yes, by “we” I mean “me”… and “you”, too, if you like.

“Light and Dark on Neglect” almost became my first post of 2015. But I didn’t want my blogging year to begin with emotional magma, and chose to start it with “Resolute to Lick and Tell” instead. The horridness evoked by those women’s actions still lingers, but my muse and I worked on turning the essence of soul-eating rot into life-giving fertilizer. The resulting story isn’t pleasant, but the characters helped me understand certain things… and provided me with much needed release.

Have you read or experienced something that left you growling and baring your teeth lately? If so, how did you choose to deal with it? As always, self-incrimination is optional. 

 Chandra Nalaar, a character in The Purifying Fire, by Laura Resnick 

35 comments:

  1. Nothing as serious as those articles. But daughter is being as self absorbed as usual. Planning on disrupting the household's lives to suit herself.

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    1. Thank goodness is nothing as serious as those articles. No one should have to go through that...

      Go ahead and shake things up a bit. Sometimes we need to bring in the chaos in order to get to a place where the kind of order we can live with is a possibility.

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    2. Even chaos needs funding. Esp. when taking 3 minor children across country with no clear idea on how to support them.

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    3. Goodness gracious... Making wild and irresponsible decisions when we are on our own is silly, but it often ends up affecting us more than anyone else. But when others are involved, especially if the "others" in question aren't old enough to care for themselves, well... that is a terrible thing. Just a terrible thing... I hope reality makes herself present before any damaging decisions are made. I will have you and them in my thoughts.

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  2. Like you, I refuse to believe that “people are born with their destinies burned in their souls.”. If that were the truth, why bother? Just sit in front of Facebook, because it's all going to happen anyway. I like the weird paths that unexpected choices open for us. I've made some jaw-dropping ones and they've made me very loved, very secure and very happy.

    As for miserable stories about the crappy things some people do to those who are vulnerable, I have to remember that these stories are in the news. They're in the news because they are significant; because they are not the mundane world we know and trust. They're rare events. A million children lovingly cared for by their parents/guardians doesn't make the news because, happily enough, it's not newsworthy. It's the everyday wonderful, the beauty of ordinary lives, that keeps things going.

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    1. "They're in the news because they are significant; because they are not the mundane world we know and trust." I will remember that, too. ♥

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  3. Evil is consuming , it is epidemic in my opinion. This is a Pandora's Box subject and I am on slow bubble with discuss for human behaviour.
    When the bile clears I may have something worth reading.........xoDebi

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    1. Evil can be quite consuming indeed. That's one of the reasons why it's so important to laugh at inappropriate times, maybe the unexpected noise will confuse the bastard. I know that there are times when we don't feel like laughing, or even thinking about the gesture... At that time, I try to lean on those who love me enough to scare the uglies for me until I can do it for myself. You are loved by many, my dear Debi. And our laughter and cackles can send evil running back into its nasty pit. *cackling and baring teeth* ♥

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  4. I just read the article and I'm sickened. It's so disturbing to contemplate the vile truths that might be hiding right under our noses behind seemingly picture-perfect facades. :(

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    1. I still can't shake my head at the woman in Connecticut posting fake pictures, and her family having no idea even though they live just a couple of streets over. And how the hell do these two women sleep at night? Insane.

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  5. Power of Choice is correct Magaly, we all have it, but to a few, wise, empathic choices aren't in their makeup, hard to figure these people out(?) I don't know why someone would choose to kill little innocents, have them suffer, starve & die in their own filth, I don't know(?) easy to say psychopathic I guess, but there were choices made, and I guess premeditated choices(?) so not mad, f-ing BAD, and the children she showcased(?) so not stupid, how freaking messed up???? We all have choices, but the consequences of hers, both those 'mothers' tragic, so angry.

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    1. I agree. If she had the foresight to put up a "healthy" front to show to the world, then she was sane enough to know that what she was doing to the other babes was beyond wrong. Whatever that woman has in her chest cannot be a heart.

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  6. And there will be someone else worse, the lawyers that try to explain away their choices, make excuses, shift blame... Lowest of the low.

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    1. Don't even get me started about how the defense has approached this issue, I might vomit all over my keyboard... or implode from the rage. *sigh*

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  7. I'm not sure I have the words that could even address these hellacious acts. Immediately I ask the question why? Why would anyone behave this way? Stories like these make my heart ache and my skin crawl.

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    1. I think the skin-crawling effect this realities have on us is what reminds us that we aren't rotten inside.

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  8. While I can't ignore the atrocities that permeate our reality, I prefer to experience them through dark fiction such as you write. That way I can try to convince myself that they are make-believe. Otherwise, I fear my coping skills would fail me.

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    1. Thank goodness for our minds and hearts that always fight for better things... and if they aren't always available, we shall imagine them until they are.

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  9. We get to choose, and make right and left hand turns along the way. How else can we grow if everything is written in stone for us. I served 3 years with a county child protection team dealing with abuse and neglect. Three years was all I could take. What is true is that abuse is a vicious circle and that circle has to be broken and intervention delivered. That is the part that is sadly neglected. Bureaucracy gets in the way, society gets in the way. Some of the most improbable people can be abused or be the abuser.If you grew up being abused in any way, you think that that is normal, even if it is shameful for you. Those years were a real eye opener for me. Makes you want to hug your kids real tight!

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    1. It is sad in a way, but so very true... Nothing reminds us how lucky we are like seeing how badly the lives of others have turned out. I hope those children are doing better. They must be. Anything would be better than "living" with those so-called parents.

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  10. only just about every day on FB. the religious right wing is just full of one atrocity after another. how do I deal with it? I stop looking and reading. I already do as much as I can to change what I can so the only thing left to me is to stop polluting my soul with their horrid hatefulness. as for being born with our destinies, yeah, sort of. I think we set up the parameters of our future life before we incarnate, set the lesson/s to be learned. however, we have free will once born and can choose to ignore our plans though the next opportunity for growth will have tougher parameters. eventually we will force ourselves to learn the lesson. I hope.

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    1. Staying away from ugliness is a great thing for the soul. Still, we should be prepared--soul-strong--when the ugliness cannot be filter. And these days, the latter happens too much. May we all "force ourselves to learn the lessons."

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  11. Oh yes. Yes I have. I haven't posted about it yet. In part because I've been wicked busy and haven't had much writing time at all. But it's more because when I do have a moment to write, I don't want to spend it gnashing my teeth. Nor did I want to begin my new year with something as hateful as what's been going on in the background of my life... and right now, the background is exactly where it is, and it's easier to leave it there. At some point I'll have to address it, and will probably do so on my blog. But damn it, not today. Besides, my thoughts are still churning on this one, defying the orderliness that comes with writing them down.

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    1. Sometimes (most times, for me) I make sense of things by writing them down. A piece or two is so horrid that I just burn it. But the purging process remains useful. I will keep you in my thoughts, I hope that ugliness clears out. ♥

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  12. We've had a few "parent kills kids then themselves" over the "festive" season....heartbreaking and mind numbing events. But what grates on me is that we get a news headline then nothing...nadda...no suggestion of what may have caused such tragedies. This leaves us with heads full of scenario...what would push us to such "evil"? XXX

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    1. I've been looking around for follow up articles, too. It's terrible that they leave people enraged and offer no soothing. I guess we'll have to craft our own...

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  13. I did have an experience like that not long ago. Thankfully I am well prepared for these fools and talked him down easily. Then I brought fruit and chocolate for the third party it was really all about.

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  14. I growled a lot last year! LOL! You know I have went through a lot of self healing ;o) Really looked at situations! As you said, it's all about choice! And, even though some people might think I waisted an entire year, I don't think I did, because so many things came clear to me ;o) Love you xoxoxo

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    1. We can't learn if we don't make mistakes... Every time we try (fail or succeed) we add something to our tools for living box. No waste. No ma'am. Never. ♥

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  15. I just read the article, I feel like throwing up!

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    1. Completely insane. And so very sad.

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