Tomorrow, I start to exercise regularly… after the longest hiatus I’ve ever taken.
I know I will have to take it very, very, very slowly; my body won’t be forgiving if I don’t. I just hope my mind (and my ego) can remember that little detail when the Marine no-pain-no-gain attitude that lives in my flesh and bones insists on yelling, “One more, dammit! I know you have one more in you!! Don’t give the prick the satisfaction!!!”
“Don’t give the prick the satisfaction” was my favorite boosting mantra for a very long time. I needed those words back then *so thank you, Gunnery Sergeant Highway*. But no more; I’m old enough to know that I’m the only person I need to satisfy, and being a prick to my own delicious self sounds painful and uncomfortable.
I will start with modified versions of my Daily Thirteen. My physical therapists and I have been working on techniques to protect my shoulder, my hip, my lower back and the damaged nerve in my left flank, which has been driving me half-mad for almost two years. There has been a lot of trial and error: some of the modifications work wonderfully… others make me cry auntie in under less than 6 seconds. The latter are placed in the to-be forgotten (for now) box of exorcised exercise demons.
In the past, when I took a mildly lengthy break, my body would regain its familiar shape and strength after 13 or so weeks of regular exercise—muscle memory and all. After almost 24 months, I’m sure my muscles can barely remember why we used to growl and scream motivational curses while doing flutter kicks and monkey f*ckers.
My legs are soft. My core needs a map to find strong, defined muscles. I haven’t seen my endurance in ages. But that’s okay; I have the same will and a wiser soul. The three of us can do this. Because we have to: I need my tummy and upper back strong again, so that they can help support my lower back and shoulder. And because we want to: I enjoy the feeling of shapely legs supporting my ginormous head, almost as much as I delight in a challenge that makes me bare my teeth while growling self-encouraging curses.
So… my Wicked Luvs, what have you and your sexy-self been up to?