Keeping My Cool When Assaulted by the Fires of Common Stupidity

I love my Dad and he adores me. I have no doubt that I am one of the luckiest daughters in the universe. If you, like me, happen to be one of the oddest fruits in your family tree, then you already understand that having a loving father means a lot.

My Dad is my champion, friend and accomplice. He defends me from busybodies, makes sure I know when (and if) I’m being unreasonable, supports my decisions (even if he doesn’t completely agree with them), is proud of my every triumph and of how I deal with my failures; he loves me exactly the way I am, and is ready to bare his teeth in the face of any person who might imply that I need to conform to his or her idea of propriety

I summon those thoughts—that everlasting treasure of love—every time an idiot opens his or her mouth and nothing but crap comes out of it. I remind myself that even if Nature has birthed a lot of waste that passes for human, she has also created great souls like my Dad. And that, my Wicked Luvs, makes it all fine… It keeps me from losing my cool when assaulted by the fires of common stupidity. I owe most of my patience (and all of my good nature) to the heart of a Dad who understands the daughter he sired (No, he is not a vampire and I’m not a mare; I just like the word).

All of the above reminds me that to be fair, to be polite and to be mildly forgiving of someone else’s disregard of my worldview can be infuriating business. The same knowledge nudges me to move a step further and try to help friends and family understand that my disbeliefs and beliefs are as valid, as appropriate, as holy, as valuable, as happiness-inducing and as important to me as theirs are to them. And if they choose to remain blind, deaf and delusional that’s their problem.

In the end, I have to please only me and aim to make happy only those who find joy in the heart of the person who I already am. Anyone with half-baked dreams of turning me into a copy of their unimaginative, miserable, undesirable selves can suck on a sack of frostbitten toes. 
Sometimes I get the urge to close my eyes,
turn upside down
and smile while showing a lot of teeth.
So I do it…
and it feels good, good, good!

33 comments:

  1. There's always SOMEONE around who will go "tsk, tsk" about everyone else's life. Glad you have your Dad as champion in your corner!

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  2. Ha ha - that picture is just filled with mischief!

    I can't even begin to imagine what it's like to suck on a sack of frostbitten toes, but it sounds quite grim and exactly what some deserve.

    The love that yourself and your dad share is heart warming :)

    Have a wonderful day x

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    1. It was taken on a great day. A day full of fun, ice cream and chocolate. Fun day, indeed!

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  3. I LOVE your toothy upside down smile.......:D XXX

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  4. You are lucky to have the dad you do. Mine was constantly trying to change me into something he thought more suitable.

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    1. Your Dad reminds me of my maternal grandmother. The lady might have had the best of intentions, but... well, you know how that goes.

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    2. Um, I meant paternal grandmother. My maternal grandmother was an angel!

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  5. Bag of frost bitten toes.... hee hee. I don't know why that gave me such a giggle. I am happy that you were blessed with such a wonderful caring father. My Dad is an odd one and may not see things the way I do but he has always stood by me and stood up for me so I understand where you are coming from.

    Love your toothy upside down smile. ;)

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    1. It made me giggle when I wrote it, too. So maybe we are riding the same energy wave. ;-D

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  6. You are so wonderfully lucky to have a father like that. Please cherish every day you have with him. And next time you see him, please give him a huge hug from me.

    This is a wonderful post and every day you are a glowing reflection of the love and support you have received from him. I'm certain he couldn't be prouder of his wonderful daughter.

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    1. I will. Always. And I promise to give him an extra tight hug from you.

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  7. You are a fortunate one to have the Dad you do and he to have you for a Daughter. As to those that refuse to understand, well you are also fortunate.....because without the negative, the positive never seems quite as rich. Or at least that's how I view it. All things are lessons if you look on them that way. All opportunities to "educate". Smile on my darling girl. Oma Linda

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    1. "without the negative, the positive never seems quite as rich." Those words make me shine, my beloved Oma Linda.

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  8. Now that looks just the way I picture you! A magical trickster, always doing the unexpected. That is my new favourite photo of you. Your Dad sounds like a good man, I mean Good Man. They are the best of the best and when you are related to one - or in a relationship with one, you have landed on your feet!

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    1. I love that picture and the shirt I'm wearing in it. It was taken on a loud day full of wine, chocolate and friendly laughter. We all need one of (or 100 of those).

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  9. Make em suck lemons.....my dad always taught me to be me authentically too, wonderful men raise strong daughters be proud you deserve to be!

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    1. May the universe bless the Great Dads of the world.

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  10. Nice picture. Sometimes doing something silly can really change your day. For me it is dancing. There is nothing like a silly dance with some silly music to help boost my sprit. Thanks for the photograph.

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    1. Yes, ma'am! A little cackle and a little giggle can be rather miraculous. ;-D

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  11. You are so fortunate to have your father! And, your father is so fortunate to have you! I love your toothy smile!
    This paragraph,
    In the end, I have to please only me and aim to make happy only those who find joy in the heart of the person who I already am. Anyone with half-baked dreams of turning me into a copy of their unimaginative, miserable, undesirable selves can suck on a sack of frostbitten toes.
    Means a lot to me and I will be writing it down in my special book ;o)
    Keep being you Magaly!
    Big Hugs, xoxoxox

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    1. You honor my words, my beloved Crow Goddess! May we always keep them true!

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  12. You can't be anyone else but YOURSeLF! so don't waste precious energe on anything else! Now PARTY!
    xoxoxoDebi

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    1. And when we try being or acting like someone other than who we are, we die a little. And no one deserves that sacrifice from us. And yes, PARTY!

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  13. Oh my what a great post & dad/daughter relationship :) My dad is someone I still miss, he 'got' my Frank Frazetta obsession, encouraged my art though he couldn't draw a stick figure, accepted I could barely stand to be outdoors in the sun let alone play sport (& he a sports champ), realised I would never play the violin, though it broke mummo's heart (just a little) taught me to read a form guide, and accepted that I would always be a little odd, just as he accepted my siblings for all their amazing qualities & maybe occasional shortcomings... ahh, got to go make paella, your post has me wanting to hug you, you look like a wonderful Christmas light the way your face is all lit-up like that :)
    Oh, & yep I KNOW we are oh so different, and yet I had no problem in saying I went to church to you, you know why, because people that are awesome just accept other people and their beliefs, they embrace difference not try to make us all suck on those same flavours... don't know about you, but I'm happy we are all different... like totally x

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    1. Different is festive, lovely and complete. It makes the world and create great dances. I pray for more people who can understand each other the way we do. Friendship and love is about respect, about valuing the things those we love find important. And if we don't understand them, oh well, we understand our friends' hearts.

      P.S. I'm taking some of my little brother's ashes to church, soon. I shall think of you when I recite a rosary for him.

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  14. It makes me happy that you have that kind of relationship with your Dad. I wish I could have the same with mine. We are in contact, but very distant thanks to one of those "wastes that passes for human". I think my New Year resolution is to try and smile with my whole face. Inspired by you. :)

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    1. I thought of you smiling with your whole face, and a grin spread over MY face; from ear to ear and all the way to my heart. ;-D

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  15. Who keeps their spare toes in a sack? I mean really...

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    1. Exactly! They should pay for their carelessness... with a nibble or two. ;-D

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  16. I envy that father/daughter relationship. My father left us when I was three, so I never had that. It took some time to learn to just be me, and that's OK. For me it was my husband who taught me that.

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    1. Life is a strange lady, isn't she? Thank goodness that in your case, she took some and gave as well.

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