“Enjoyed all the hoopla brought on by this though… makes people use their brains…”


The following is an email I received after I replied to Fire Lyte’s replies on Eliora’s response to Fire Lyte’s article (say that 13 times fast!)“I have to say this. I hope you don’t take it the wrong way. It feels to me that you had Eliora make a huge deal about nothing. Problems like this are solved behind closed doors. They [Christians] already think that they have reasons to hate us. Why show ourselves bickering like baboons in front of them? This is not the right way to get readers to your blog, Ms. Guerrero. Shame on you!”

I will keep this short, and say that I don’t appreciate anyone who thinks that I use my friends or their feelings for what someones screwed up mind perceives to be my own gain. That is despicable. But there is a Spanish saying which suggests that “El león juzga por su condición.” Meaning that the lion judges others in accordance to what it thinks about itself. Well, to the person who judged me to be a heartless attention-seeker pile of dung, I have to say this: “It must suck to be you.”

To everyone else, I wish to offer a bit of Headology a la Magaly. This was inspired by the title of this post (a comment left by Judy) and by the words of my Knight Writer (Terry Pratchett) in Maskerade: “Granny Weatherwax… practiced headology… And although there may be some superficial similarities between a psychiatrist and a headologist, there is a huge practical difference. A psychiatrist, dealing with a man who fears he is being followed by a huge and terrible monster, will endeavor to convince him that monsters don’t exist. Granny Weatherwax would simply give him a chair to stand on and a very heavy stick.”

Headology (a la Magaly)
The psychiatrist commits a great disservice when trying to convince the man that the monster doesn’t exist. It might exist only in the man’s head, and that doesn’t make the situation less scary or less real. I admire Granny’s methods, for I am a practical Witch, but a man with a chair and a stick is a time bomb waiting to explode in the face of anyone who startles him—monster or not.

I believe that an interdisciplinary treatment might work best. Why not give the man the chair and the stick (so that he can feel safe), while we use our psychiatric prowess to talk to him? To explain to the man that we can’t quite see his monster, but that maybe he could describe it for us.  

Intelligent discussion might let the headologist/psychiatrist combo see that it was not that man’s monster didn’t exist, but that it looked different from their own monster. The man, on his part, might learn that it wasn’t that the headologist/psychiatrist combo was blind, but that they couldn’t see through his eyes, his babbling, his cursing, his name-calling, or his screaming about monsters.

Oops! I guess I lied. It wasn’t that short after all. But I’m not sorry; for the more we talk the better we understand each other. And that, my Wicked Darlings, is the reason why I invited Eliora to use her words at Pagan Culture: I enjoy a topic that “makes people use their brains. What about you, my Luvs, how would you approach the man’s monster?    
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24 comments:

  1. As far as the comment made to Eliora, it reminds me of how a kid gets caught w/his hand in the cookie jar, so to speak... Why is it that some resort to hurtful/mean comments instead of just voicing it in an adult manner? Or was the commenter just trying to get a rise out of her? If so, she succeeded... As the alcoholic mantra goes: " point the finger and the finger points back at you"...

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    1. I think the person who sent the email was just trying (very successfully) to be a jerk.

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  2. I'm with Granny Weatherwax....but you knew that already :D As to the person who mailed you.....if they want to skulk behind closed doors and mutter in dark corners that's fine. They can pretend to be something they are not, so as to appease those that may not approve of their faith/beliefs.....me, I walk in the light. The dark is for hunting in....
    You know that none of your friends would think for one instance that you would use us to further your own aims....we don't hide :D XXX

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    1. We can't see anything while hiding in the dark. Okay, maybe we might if we have night vision goggles, but other people will learn nothing about us. And I've never understood why anyone would think the latter is of any value these days.

      "The dark is for hunting in..." indeed.

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  3. I wasn't aware that there was bickering going on. Discussion, stating personal opinions, & bickering are different activities, last I knew.

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    1. Hm... maybe I should ask this individual for a mailing address, and then send them a dictionary ;-D

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  4. I saw no bickering. I saw differing viewpoints, respectfully offered for review. Which, btw, is what the largess of the Pagan umbrella is about. Unlike Christianity, we are not monocentric- we have no Pope, no bible, no board of directors that tells us what to think, say or believe. Paganism works for us because and not in spite of its diversity.

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    1. We do learn by sharing, by doing and by talking about it, don't we?

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  5. "Bickering like baboons"? I'll admit that my reading comprehension skills sometimes leave a bit to be desired, but I didn't see any bickering on the posts. I saw different facets of very similar ideas being exchanged. I saw discussion, not arguing. Magaly, I hope you don't get upset at the following outrage I have to let out at Mr or Mrs Lion...How dare you suggest that Magaly put Eliora up to her post? Not only is that insulting to Magaly, implying that she is a small enough person to manipulate others that way, but it is insulting to Eliora as well. While I don't know Eliora personally, I doubt that she is that weak-willed or weak-minded to be put up to something in the manner you suggest. And you had to email/message Magaly in secret? Those are the actions of a coward. Shame on YOU.

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    1. *thunderous applause* Brava, Sarah!

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    2. *echoing Kallan's applause* Thank you, Sarah

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    3. Well said, Sarah! I can assure you, Eliora is FAR from weak-willed or weak-minded. I second the second to last sentence, also. An email cannot be responded to by Magaly's supporters or Eliora's. That has been taken care of, though!

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    4. *bowing humbly* :-) I forgot about that poor man stuck on the chair swinging at invisible monsters....sorry mister! I think he should sit down on the chair, I'll pull another one up, pour myself a glass of wine and ask him to tell me about his monster. Then we'll find a creative way of banishing his monster effectively...perhaps we'll draw his monster and then burn the drawing.

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    5. Sexy Sister Sarah, you rocketh very much. Thanks for letting this person have it. Someone had to ;-)

      And I agree, maybe the monster can be conquer with a bit of talking, a little wine, and some magic.

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  6. Oh dear. Let's set the record straight, shall we?

    And, by the way - the Baboon reference does not bother me a bit. Baboons are intelligent and highly social beings.

    What I wrote, I wrote to make myself feel better, and then, once I decided that I wanted to post it, I ASKED Magaly to proof my writing because I didn't trust it to not embarrass me. Since I have no blog of my own, she offered to lend me hers for the day. This was ALL my doing, my words, my choice.

    Here, I made a public response to Firelyte's already public blog. I truly believe that the open discussion benefited all who took part, and probably some of the skulkers, too.

    In any case, it is a new day, and FireLyte and I continue to be friends, as we have been.

    But this does not address Magaly's question about the Man's Monster. Denial is a river in Egypt, so they say. Working through issues with the help of sincere friends is a loving, civilized way to deal with our monsters.

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    1. Some people are just a bit too ridiculous. Maybe they are just jealous of the baboons.

      In all seriousness, I think some individual are so lost withing themselves and their own misconceptions that they fail to see or understand reality. Nose deep in de-Nile, indeed.

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  7. I haven't a clue what this is about, but I just need to defend psychology and psychiatry: A psychiatrist would definitely ask the man to describe the monster, would understand the man's fear, and would probably even agree with the man getting a stick. Then comes meds and serious therapy :)

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    1. Ms Misantropia, you are too hilarious, and you've made me laugh aloud. Go back one post if you want to know what the whole thing is about.

      Oh and I don't think that the analogy works as well if you don't use the given quote.

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  8. I think we shall face the monsters, may be they appear to be not as big as we think, may be they look different father than what we imagine them to be...
    Hiding from what you are is the worst one can do with her/his persona... it is not the way out for sure. With time you will simply stagnate yourself.
    One of my friends says that you have to be selfish a little... to do good in life, to make new paths, to feel happy. I agree.So if the person who mailed you is feeling more happy to hide and conceal, and be as much private as he/she wants, then it is also her choice. However not really necessary to direct you what to do and what not to.

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    1. We do need to take care of ourselves first. And like you said, if that is what this individual needed, well more power to him/her. Yet, I think that most times it is easier to get to the truth by asking, and not jumping head first into conclusions that can leave us looking foolish and with a broken neck.

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  9. I think you worded that remarkably well Magaly, and I fully agree with your Headology.
    I think we all have different ways of dealing with our Monsters, for some it is quietly and in private for others it helps to get them out in the open. Each to their own.

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    1. Indeed. No one knows our monsters the way we do, so we know what weapons can defeat them best (and fastest).

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  10. I think a chair and a heavy stick, with some talking, sounds great to me ;o) Magaly, how come you get these e-mails?? I have to say, I love you sharing them! I love the Spanish saying! Gets me thinking, like all your blog posts do! Big Hugs ;o)

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    1. I get all kinds of emails. Most of them, really good ones that make me all warm and happy inside. And others like this one, which I share because many times I wonder if others have the same thoughts. Or just so that the Sarahs of the world can have a go at this kind of idiot ;-D

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