Perfidious Bloggers and Other Things Skulking in the Dark


I was going to wait until after the end of May Monster Madness before writing about blogging practices that irk me to the bone, and inspire me to want to bite the offenders’ faces off. Then I spent a lot of my Tuesday and Wednesday glaring at my inbox, and my annoyance decided to snark about it a littler earlier. Life has thought me that crankiness dies sooner when shared *glowers wisely* So... here are a few of the types that have been raising the hackles on monster’s back:

Flattering Liars – I got at least three direct messages from bloggers who “read Pagan Culture all the time and love it,” but they “never comment because [my] writing is so incredible and complete that adding to it would be a sin.” Seriously people, how gullible do you think I am? You might never read this post, for I doubt you fly by here often, but I will still say that my spam folder is sick of your kind.

Out of the Blue Nominators – In “No Awards Please, I’m Curmudgeonly,” Francie confesses (after years of showing restraint, the proper Canadian thing to do) that she doesn’t care for blog awards. They annoy her for many reasons, one of them being that sometimes the nominators don’t read her blog. I totally agree. When a stranger gives me an award, I usually reply with a smiley face. That’s it. I don’t forward the award. I don’t say peep about it. When I give awards, I do it with purpose (that has nothing to do with attracting traffic to my own blog!). I use them to introduce new blogs that I think you might enjoy, or to remind a seasoned blogger that her words still rock my thinking bone.

Intellectual Thieves – When someone steals your work and passes it as their own, it freaking hurts. You can feel the pain in Plumrose Lane’s “A Few Bad Apples.” And my friend Eliora, who doesn’t have a blog for me to direct you to, has been heartbroken (and highly pissed off) by people stealing her designs and having the nerve to even post pictures swiped from her shop. A bit over a year ago, a blogger who I (and many other people) considered trustworthy stole three of my articles and sold them to an overseas magazine. It has been a while, but I still growl when I think about the betrayal. 

Inactive Self-Promoters – During Witches in Fiction 2013... to the Bone, someone told me, “You work too hard on blog parties. You would make things easier for yourself, if you made it into a hop. All links would always be there.” If blog hops actually worked, I would be the happiest of all bunnies. But there are too many bloggers who relish in the distasteful art of inactive self-promotion—they join every party, hop, fest… but don’t participate. I understand that sometimes we have to pull from an event at the last minute, but you know the kind of blogger I’m talking about. For them, I’m willing to go the extra mile and add links manually as posts come in. I can’t stand parasites.  

There are other things that make me bare my teeth... Like emails from individuals who (have never commented on any of my posts, but) have the ovaries or balls to ask me to visit their blogs, to share their links, and to “please help [them] get the word out there.” But I think this is enough for now. If they had the decency to do some research (or use common sense) they would realize that in order to get people to visit them, they need to visit people as well. And they need to speak!

Blogging is more efficient and fun when treated as a conversation; when kept friendly and honest. Don’t insult your intellect, or pretend you have what it takes to fool someone else’s. Trust me when I say that most people have a working bullshit detector. And when in doubt, go back to the basics: give others the same amount of respect you expect from them. However, if you enjoy being insulted, well... then just leave others alone. To create meaningful connections, virtually and face-to-face, we need to spend time getting to know people, showing them proper respect, and then going from there… Try engaging bloggers’ minds with a comment (or 3), and they’ll come to your cyber-home to see what else you have. Some might even stay.
The Hunger,” by SunshineShelle—my dear friends brush conjures deliciously uncanny visions
I always go back for more, and more, and more...

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70 comments:

  1. Delightfully crabby Magaly Dearest. It amazes me at how many possible types of offenders there are. Well, wait, I worked in the service industry for six years, so,... no it doesn't. Anyways, hope things mellow out for ya. ~Dragon

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    1. Oh these these kind of stuff happen so much that most times I rant about them, let them burn out, and move on. But ranting about it can be rather freeing ;-D

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  2. The stealing of the products of your own mind is the most annoying and disappointing thing ever! People having not enough of their own creativity try to be well said parasites! I mean I understand to be inspired by someone's writing and take it example by... well, what concerns other bloggers, may be you should take it easy in a sense let them be whoever they are, and ignore as soon as their words don't hurt your feelings. You can't change people.
    I hope you are fine now and don't let anyone ruin your artistic Pagan spirit!

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    1. It is frustrating, and in the case of some damaging financially. It isn't fair. But we can't let the bloodsuckers get us down, can we? And when people act this way, eventually they get what's coming to them...

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  3. Again you hit the nail on the head. I would add one thing though the part about visiting other blogs and posting/replying, people worry to much about how much they should put in their post and really it does not matter just post the response that is in your head and heart.

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    1. There are times when I will read a post and tell the writer that I find it very interesting and thought provoking, but I don't know how to help. There are some topics that we just don't know about, and we should probably stay out of the conversation. These are not the kind of bloggers I'm referring to. My problem is with the ones who don't really read, but feel the need to add something like "Great post" or "This is very cute" and the post is about something like too much bleeding during one's period, which is not cute at all lol

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  4. Powerful post, well said! I think blogging has changed aaaaa-lot, I am a simple-heart and love connection and enjoying everyone's creativity and whatever magic they have to share and shine out, I truly appreciate and respect this wonderful world of kindred bloggers... but nowadays yes..there are so many out there with different intentions..and those who steal, that is awful, I am sorry that happened to you and others..it has happened to me too. very sad!
    Hugs to you, keep shining..your presence in blogland is appreciated and admired!
    Victoria

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    1. I'm right there with you. Blogging gives us a way for us to connect with minds we might have never had the pleasure of encountering otherwise. I, for instance, feel blessed to have met people like the authors of Magic Love Crow, SunshineShelle, Daydream Believer... These ladies have truly touched my life. Their art is alive...

      When someone takes something that wonderful and abuses it, it annoys me. But you know what? The bad doesn't outweigh the good, so we shall blog on!

      It is very nice to meet you, Victoria. I just stopped by your cyber-home, and my mind still dancing in your sunshine. I'm glad you stopped by ;-)

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    2. Hugs Magaly, thanks for your kind words!
      I know some of the ladies you mentioned , they are truly fabulous!
      yes you are right, the good outweighs the bad of it all, that is why I keep blogging too....and for me, I'd rather have a small handful of true kindreds as visitors/commenters and genuine followers than a kazillion followers with not so good intentions. Yes, I feel super blessed by all the wonderful souls in blogland..they are amazing and make blogging very very special!
      HUgs
      V

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  5. So well said, Magaly. Your title use of "perfidious" is so very appropriate. Using the creative energy of another without their permission, or passing someone else's concept as your own is low behavior. Like most amoral activity, it will always thrive amongst those who have little character and self-esteem.

    I have reached the point where I am tired of hearing, "Oh, get over it - 'Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery'." By definition (Miriam-Webster) to flatter is "to praise excessively especially from motives of self-interest". The self-interest part of the definition says it all. Intellectual theft in any form is simply that - theft.

    Inspiration, on the other hand wears an entirely different type of dress. To catch a glimpse of a new use of similar style, or a bit of phrasing can buoy spirit and does wonders for the ego. To be so influenced by another's creativity that it sparks one's own imagination can be wonderful synergy.

    Once inspired, asking permission and giving honest acknowledgement and citing goes a long way. To write "let me share ABC's words with you", or "XYX's blog started my thinking . . ", or "I thought I'd try my hand at a design similar to JKL's".

    Sadly, we rarely every see such acknowledgement. And, "Oh, get over it" is just another case of the social trend to shift responsibility from perpetrator to victim.

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    1. Indeed. Inspiration is a great thing, and we should honor those who touch the soul of our muse. I'm sure you've noticed that I use the work of SunshiShelle and Daydream Believer quite a bit. There is a reason for that. Their work puts colors and shape and visual vibrancy to things that live in my head: Shelle's sweet and creepy strokes, Gina's sunny and intense portrayals of nature and thought... I admire them and share their art as much as I can.

      I've written about their work... created stories based on it. And every time I do, I tell everyone whose seed help sprout the ides. It is proper, and it is what art is all about: taking something already amazing and adding a bit of your own greatness to it, without stealing any of the grace.

      Imitation without recognition is not thievery. Acknowledgment is one of the sincerest forms of flattery.

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    2. To my mind, 'imitation' is more along the line of 'inspiration'. It certainly is not synonymous with intellectual theft, although it might be with 'laziness'.

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    3. I disagree, Petoskystone. The person who "imitated" Eliora's design copied every single detailed down to the color. The copy was so exact that the "imitator" just went ahead a copied the pictures Eliora used on her website to promote the imitations. This individual never said that the idea of the design came from Eliora--if that's not intellectual theft, then I don't know what is.

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    4. Then the person who stole Elioras' design *copied* her work, not *imitated* it. An *imitation* should mirror the person who created the work, with just a hint of the work which inspired it. A person can sulk that the were only inspired in the face of copying all they want. It's still a copy, & lying about it makes them not only a thief, but an ignorant one as well.

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    5. I'm with you all the way, Petoskystone, and I'm almost sure Eliora feels the same way. That is the reason why I put "imitator" inside a pair of very sarcastic quotation marks... The thief in question kept on bringing up the whole imitation/flattery bit, which just adds insult to crime and harm. Time (and random idiots) have taught me that with great ignorance comes great stupidity.

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  6. You're right, Magaly! It had to be said.

    And what an evocative artwork by SunshineShelle! Love it.

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    1. Shelle rocks with teeth bared ;-D

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  7. I love all of Shelle's images too...nearly as much as I love all your words :D...no bullshit here :D XXX

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  8. Well ranted, wickedy one. We've all been touched by the "uglies" and the offending entities. Such a waste of everyone's time to have to deal with it but it is a part of blogging and you are so right when you say that sharing the irksome events makes it easier. Bitch and moan really is better than biting someone's face off, but still....
    And there is nothing flattering about theft. It is just ugly. Oma Linda

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    1. Venting is a good thing when done in moderation ;-D

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  9. Well said my Wicked Love! It seems this is an ever increasing aspect in blog land. Instead of people learning to NOT do something they and the rest of us know is wrong, they just continue to perpetuate the negativity with no cares in the world.

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    1. They say that no idea is original, and I understand that. But when someone takes everything from someone else and says, "Look what I make!" that's a terrible thing. It's stealing of the worse kind. They are stealing someone's dreams.

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  10. YES! I agree with all of these, makes me "roar my terrible roars and gnash my terrible teeth and roll tmy terrible eyes and show my terrible claws" like a good Wild Thing does when heaped with annoyance.

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    1. Now I want to wear my Where the Wild Things Are t-shirt!

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  11. Completely agree with all this and more, wish I had the "ovaries" to express it as well as you did!

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    1. I think you have plenty of ovaries, dear Tess lol

      By the way, the first person who spoke about people "having the ovaries" was Mina, my Green Witch with Sprinkles is very imaginative ;-D

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  12. I love the word "perfidious". I'm going to have to find a way to work it into conversation today...with credit given to the Witchy Woman who introduced it this morning. I agree...it is very frustrating when the hard work of others is stolen and used to benefit someone who hasn't done crap to earn it. Hopefully the offenders read your venting here and are reminded to conduct themselves in a more honorable fashion.

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    1. I hope you tell let us know about the conversation with "perfidious" in it ;-D

      We can only hope that the naughty ones read this and adjust their ways.

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    2. At no time today was I able to work "perfidious" into my conversations with the dog or my exclamations at the lemon shark that followed my kayak. Oh...and for the times when I have signed up for a blog party and then allowed other crap to get in the way, my many apologies. I was not intentionally perfidious. :-)

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    3. So... what did you tell the lemon shark? Did it offer a toothy grin in return? Maybe it winked one of those gray-zombie-looking eyes? In all seriousness, how often are you greeted by one of those fellows? I know they aren't as ruthless as their bull brothers, but I've heard they have a very short fuse...

      Be careful, my pretty. There is way too much wine waiting to be enjoyed by you ;-D

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    4. Well, at the time I was wanting to be able to get in the water for "pit stop", so I told him to "Go on now. Shoo. Come by and see me later at the dock, and I'll give you some Wahoo." He flashed me some tail and rolled his big zombie eye at me, then swam off for a little while. He returned later with a smaller version of himself..."Take your kid to work day" at the Lemon Shark raw bar. Well, I don't know how in need of anger management they are, but I know I am much more cautious of the small ones in shallow water than their bigger counter parts in deep water. Big=well-fed. Deep water=adequate room for him not to be threatened by me. Small and shallow water...?
      I shall toast the zombie shark with some of the wine at dinner tonight. :-)

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  13. Thank you and well said! I have enjoyed your blogs and Facebook status updates for awhile ( and have commented, lol). You now join the ranks of some of my favorite ranters.

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    1. Sharon, you've made me roar!

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  14. WOW! I love your blog and try and get here as much as possible to read them. If I don't I go back and read all that I have missed. I just love your post. I also let you know how much I like your post. Sometime I don't think I comment because I just don't know what to say. LOL!! I am still taking in what you have said. I have to say you are one of my favorite bloggers. I blog for fun and if I have no followers no bother. I just do it for fun. Having you comment or even following gives me joy. I feel like I am talking to you one on one. LOL!!

    YOUR AWESOME! I think you are a lot of peoples favorite blogger and love your writings. :)

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    1. You are too sweet. I'm pretty sure my head is about 5 times bigger ;-D

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  15. Some of the best bloggers I've found have been either from comments on my own blog, or comments on blogs I read. I'll go through the comments, and if replies catch my eye I'll check out what blogs/websites they have. Its a good way to find new friends, not just bring traffic to your own site. :)

    Even so, I don't get a lot of comments. I don't know if that's because I just don't have anything interesting (I hope that's not the case), or what.. But I can always count on you to comment once a week or so. :)

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    1. ETA: I also share some posts on my FB page from other bloggers. Just my way to pass it forward. :)

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    2. I always read comments, too. It's like overhearing a conversation (invited) and add your bit to it. It is one of the reasons why I don't understand why people don't reply to the comments others live on their blogs. I usually stop commenting on blogs where the bloggers don't reply. It feels like you are talking to someone and they are just staring at you.

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    3. Yeah I always try to reply to comments. Even if its just an "I agree" or simply a smiley face. I feel I need to acknowledged they took the time out of their day to comment.

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  16. I agree. I have noticed this week, since joining my first blog hop ever - May Monster Madness - that many people just join and do the barest minimum, or nothing. How pathetic is that?

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    1. Don't get me started. There are people who haven't posted anything since weeks before the hop even started. So unfair.

      I understand if something came up. Just tell the host to remove your name, you know? Or if you know that you can't post everyday (like me, I've been posting every other day) make sure that the host is okay with that before you jump into the mix.

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  17. Jeesh! Somebody stole your work and sold it to an overseas publication!! Why am I shocked? I know there are horrid people out there but there is something about stealing someone's creativity that is like stealing a bit of their soul. It is different than stealing their wallet or their clean laundry! Very upsetting!!

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    1. It hurt more deeply because I know the person who did it. At least when a stranger does something like that we tell ourselves that it isn't personal, they are just worthless disrespectful thieves, but when a "friend" does it... well, it sucks.

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  18. You've hit all the nails on the head in this post, Magaly. The worst are the flattering liars who are intellectual thieves. I got burnt by a few of those a few years ago (and closed a collaborate novel community because of it), and I still can smell the charcoal every now and again when deciding what to share. But, I am enjoying the sharing too much to stop, and in closing the community, I started to focus more on my own work, so it's all good. Annoying, but good. ;)

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    1. I enjoy the sharing, too. We would never let those idiots steal the thunder of our writing and reading pleasure, would we?

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    2. Not at all. I'm far too stubborn for that, and you are very determined. Wearing our horns proudly, the Taurus and the Aries witches. Thieves should be very afraid and hope they can run faster than we can fly ;)

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    3. My broom just quivered in excitement ;-D

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  19. I love that you manually add the links when you do your blog parties. So many people sign up for hops and don't do anything or visit anyone. At least with your blog parties I always know there will be great content in the links =]

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    1. I feel the way. It seriously suck when you waste your time going to blogs that have nothing to do with what you are looking for. Cheating creeps lol

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  20. Hey lady, sorry to butt in, but your selection, Oya, is today's May Monster. It's up at me blog!

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  21. Just saying venting AND Vegimite... AND wine... AND a little cheese too... all good in moderation.

    You Magaly, LOAD IT UP GIRL, friggin love your words, hate anyone would steal anything :( and read all those gorgeous comments on your posts (said many times before, your followers truly rock), thanks Gina & Debra ;) ya sweeties...

    Don't know what a blog 'hop' actually is, sometimes I think I'm living in 2 realities with no real understanding of either, but live in hop (sorry 'hope') one day I may succeed in one... so far, I have not, so far, I'm (sorta/kinda) OK with it, but one day I will embrace the delicious dudes that I have tasted via your blog and give them the full attention they deserve, because there is nothing better than the stimulation one gets by exposing oneself to intelligent conversation, visuals, (original) stories and ideas put forward by the awesome creatures that one meets right here, like HERE. through your posts :)

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    1. What a delicious recipe for relaxation ;-D

      A blog hop is a blog party where people (most of them, at least) add the links of all of the participants to each post. I don't particularly care for them because, well, I don't want a bunch of links from people who I don't know on my blog. You just never know who is going to say what, and you are offering a link to their nonsense (or to nothing).

      And you are right, "there is nothing better than the stimulation one gets by exposing oneself..." hehehehehe *couln'g help myself*

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  22. PS thanks for showcasing "The Hunger"... yep, totally chuffed Ms Wickedness :)

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    1. She's so pretty that I always want to show off her toothy personality ;-)

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  23. Magaly, I agree with everything you have said ;o)
    I love blogging and connecting with other people! I might be a little late getting around, but I try to truly read and comment on the blogs I care about ;o) I have always thought, if I have only a few followers, that is fine with me, because those people really want to follow me ;o)
    I am so sorry that 3 of your articles were stole! How terrible! I don't know what I would do about that, especially from someone you trusted!!!!
    To tell you the truth, I am honored about blog awards, but I don't know about them anymore! LOL!
    I love Shelle's art ;o) I love Shelle ;o) She is a special girl ;o)
    Big Hugs Darling ;o)

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    1. I think of awards in the same way I think of compliments: they are as meaningful as the person giving them and the way in which they are delivered. It is the reason why I always end up braking the rules when it comes to them, if I follow each step it is likely that what I'm doing wouldn't be as Magaly-like as it should.

      And yes, Shelle's art rocks... and sometimes screams ;-D

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  24. Oh what to say... what to say... *smile*... well first off I shed a few just seeing the reference to my post ~ thank you. It's been one hell of a week (year) and you're currently serving as my mental "go-to" on some new situations I'm dealing with ~ yeah, I'm actually thinking "what would Magaly do" as I muddle blindly through this unknown territory of dealing with the entirely deranged and misguided. It's not that I could begin to guess how much better you'd handle the ravenous idiots it's just that it is possible to appreciate and care for those we've come to call online friends, if we just take the time. As usual you hit it all squarely on the head and I thank you for that as well.
    ♥Sharon

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    1. The last four years have taught me that friends are friends regardless of where they come from. That has been true by the way the internet has changed things. And the same thing is true for fiends, they do all kinds of nasty things... and we can do little to deal with them, other than learn to recognize them and leave them behind.

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    2. Oh, I meant I considered you a friend, not the nasties. *smile* It's just nice to know we can get "to know" someone through regular visits and reading their musings. Granted that "knowing" is only a small slice of a much bigger picture but small pieces of friendships (or of our friends) can carry us through difficult times. Thanks for being an inspiration through tougher days.
      ♥Sharon

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    3. I was agreeing *cough, cough* People's artistic expressions, blogging and the things that go on behind the scene tend to tell us a lot about who is who. I hope you know I consider you a friend,too ;-)

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  25. I seriously love you.. and am giving you my "Ranty McRant" award ;) *ducks and runs*

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    1. You just made me roar. We might have to create a Ranty McRant Award lol

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  26. I hated the blog awards too. It just seemed so......narcissistic in a way? I used to have a page on Blogger just to post those on but never pass them on. I did a few times but it just seemed so.....icky. The death of the blog award would be celebrated by me.

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    1. I don't hate awards. I think some of them can be fun and useful. And when people mean what they say, they are also sweet.

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  27. I am so with you here sweetie! You cannot imagine the amount of anonymous crap (okay, you probably can) I have been receiving lately or the emails I get to help someone get their name "out there." I think, "and who are you???" It is truly rude. You just carry on with your bad ass self.

    And I am so sorry for being so far behind in my visits. Honey, my soul sucking job has been working me to death at a time my lupus is really active. It has not been a good combination and I have felt just terrible in every way possible. Anyway, sending you (sincere) major hugs. Mina

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    1. Some people are rude and clueless. And they make the mistake to believe that we are silly...

      Sorry the lupus is doing its number, and the job is not helping the matter. I hope things get better soon. I send you that hug back, times a bunch of love!

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