The Skeleton in His Milkshake


The straw was clogged. Geoffrey sucked harder. And harder. Then hard enough to nearly make his eyeballs pop, if the obstruction hadn’t been suctioned up through the thin plastic tube and into his mouth.

He chewed twice before his brain told him, Geoffrey boy, are vanilla milkshakes supposed to be crunchy? He spat the masticated bits into his palm, looked at it with curious disgust, and began to gag and choke on curses. “There are bones in my milkshake!” *cough, gag, curse* “Who’s in charge of this place?” *cough, gag, curse*

By the time the restaurant manager got to his red-faced customer, other patrons had formed an inquisitive circle around Geoffrey and his milkshake. 

“Bones? Really?” said a man, examining the soft drink he had gotten from the same restaurant  “Are there any more in the cup?”

Geoffrey squatted, wiped his hand on the floor, and dumped the rest of the milkshake next to the smear. The sight made him whimper.

People gasped. A boy of about ten poked at the spill with the tip of his running shoe, paying special attention to a small lump. “It’s a tiny skull,” he said.

“Not a skull,” said his mother, who had stepped forward to pull her son back. “It’s a whole mouse skeleton, minus the hind legs.” She turned to look at Geoffrey. “I think you drank the legs.”

The manager broke through the crowd, yelling, “Please, there is nothing to see here. Everything is under—” His claims were drowned by the sound of Geoffrey hurling all over his black shoes.

***
Happy April Fools’ Day, my Wicked Luvs! Maybe… muahahaha 
***

All jokes aside, let me help remove the nasty tastes out of your mind’s mouth, 
by presenting the first Witches in Fiction 2013… to the Bone giveaway, 
sponsored by SunshineShelle.

Smile at Ms. or Mr. Grinning Skull
- acrylic
- 10 x 8 inches on a canvas board
- touched by the cutest of Spring flowers
Here is what you need to do, if you want this wondrous work of art to come home to you:
Leave a comment sharing your feelings about Ms. or Mr. Grinning Skull
What makes you want her… or him?

for extra entries:
- visit SunshineShelle, on Etsy, and come back here to tell me about your favorite piece (one entry)
- share your reactions about “The Skeleton in His Milkshake” (one entry)
- Tell me why you follow/read Pagan Culture (one entry)
 

* This is an international giveaway  
* Ends Tuesday, April 16th at 5:13 pm EST
* Happy 4th Blogoversary, my Wicked Darlings ;-)


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81 comments:

  1. Happy first day of April!
    Well..I want Ms or Mr Grinning Skulls..because I like the colors the artists used for the background - my favorite tints; also, that opposition of the flower, which was just torn away but still fresh, and the grinning skull says that there is some hope in being that cheerful afterlife? who knows.
    The Skeleton in milkshake..well I saw a programme on TV about frog shakes in Peru, so may be that guy was not aware such kind of shakes were served there... conclusion: watch TV and always ask what's in your glass.
    I'm with Pagan Culture because it gives me "food for mind", and I find many things discussed here close to my vision and feelings. Besides, Magaly, you are really an inspiring person.
    Happy 4th Blogoversary, dear!

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    1. I think we are all addicted to Shelle's colors! And I like the idea of Pagan Culture being "food for mind." ;-)

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  2. Hahahahaha...was sort of expecting it to be a tiny human skeleton...faeries do have a nasty habit of playing in kitchens :D
    I wants that Skull because she has such a sunny smile :D
    and here is a post I made for your party today http://daydreambeliever-gina.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/partyingto-bone.html :D
    So have fun ...and don't choke on your milkshake :D XXX

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    1. The skeleton of faeries, poor things... I once read a story about someone eating ice cream with faerie sprinkles, just to find out that his dessert was sprinkled with the dry remains of actual faeries. Ouch.

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  3. Oh mouse skeleton crunchy sounds! I can't count how many times I've heard these crunches between the jaws of my little kitties. We have spring's first rat on his back on the patio right now, in a small pocket in the remaining snow.

    I love that smiley Ms Skull! It reminds me of sugar skulls and Dia de los Muertos, a holiday/celebration I've been fascinated with for a long time, but unfortunately still never experienced first hand. Oh, and the painting is PURPLE! I also like SunshineShelle's other piece 'Scent of Flesh'.

    Well Magaly, I read your blog because you let it all hang out :) It's funny and interesting, sometimes heartbreaking and sometimes magical!

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    1. Such a fierce kitty! I need to go around your blog and look for pictures ;-)

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  4. Love, love, love the short story! Dark and delightful like you my bone loving witch! My entry for today is titled "For the Love of Bones" http://anthrobum.blogspot.com/2013/04/for-love-of-bones.html

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    1. "Dark and delightful" sounds good to me ;-)

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  5. What a great kick off story! Love it!

    I adore the skull painting...well...because I love "skull art" as I call it, which is simply skulls depicted in various art forms. I love the colors, the whimsical little flower, and the deep ruby eye sockets.

    I can't wait to see more as the party unfolds!

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    1. I almost started the party on the 2nd to avoid all the April Fools' stuff, but this bit came to me and it felt right. I'm glad you liked it ;-)

      "Deep ruby eye sockets," that sounds like the title of an awesome story!

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  6. I follow you because you are awesome and sexy and witchy and dark and all things awesome. *Winks* <3

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    1. *Wink, wink, wink* right back at you ;-)

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  7. My favorite work from Shelle is this, called "Scent of Flesh" :

    http://www.etsy.com/listing/106330615/vampire-original-painting-scent-of-flesh?ref=shop_home_active

    It is dark and fills me with longing. Love it.

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    1. There is something about the red eyes of "Scent of Flesh."

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  8. I follow Pagan Culture because it's fun :))

    ReplyDelete
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    1. "fun" is always a great reason ;-)

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  9. First reaction: Well, damn, that's a big straw!

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    1. My thoughts exactly when I get a shake from certain fast food restaurant lol

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  10. 'Eternal Youth' is my favorite. I especially like the cut edges as it reminds me of an outtake from a film reel.

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    1. I like the beautiful neck on the lady of "Eternal Youth"

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  11. I want the Skully painting as the spring colours would go well in my new space. Hoping I have as strong a grin as Skully after leaving Ikea!

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    1. It made me think about the circle of life...

      P.S. I need to go to Ikea, too lol

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  12. I like the Skull painting. I really like skull art. My parents are too keen on my preferences, but I don't care. :)

    I follow Pagan Culture because it's increasingly hard to find people who keep the Pagan in all things, living it and being it instead of just talking it. Magaly keeps it real and fun!

    The Skeleton in the Milkshake, cute story. I will now be paranoid the next time I buy a milkshake. :P

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    1. I've loved skulls ever since I remember and most people look at me weird, so... we can be sisters in our weirdness ;-)

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  13. Magaly, you are without a doubt the bestest April fooler I know. I feel a little like hurling myself. Very good indeed. As to SunshineShelle and her fabulous Mr/Mrs Skull, everything she paints is wonderful but I love all thinks "skeletony" and grinning skulls are in my bones.
    I posted Chapter One of Splendor House here:
    http://yeoldecronesgazette.blogspot.com/2013/04/splendor-housethe-dream.html

    Happy first day of the party darling girl.
    Oma Linda

    ReplyDelete
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    1. *Doing a happy dance because I'm a good April fooler* I have to admit that I grossed myself out a little, too.

      Shelle sees something in colors that I can only see through words. I drink it every time I get to taste her images, and I can never get enough.

      P.S. I want more "Splendor House"!

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  14. What a gorgeous skull and flower! I love the juxtaposition of the bright sunshiny daisy, the grinning skull, and the bloody background. Magaly, I didn't drink milkshakes before, but now I'm doubly sure that I NEVER will. Eeek!

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    1. Their combined effect is what makes me love them most. Life and death, and again...

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  15. Wonderful short story. My beasties and I have sworn that we're not ever getting milkshakes on April Fool's Day. Ever.

    Have a wonderful day of reading and writing!

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    1. I'm right with you guys, no milkshake on April Fools' Day ;-)

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  16. Well if I won I would probably just paint the skin back on her/her so I won't try to win her/him. Just no appreciation for the macabre, I know, ha ha. Anyway I loved that story. You are so funny, Magaly. Happy April to you!!!

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    1. I will enjoy the macabre for both of us, Francie. Your taste makes you who you are, and I adore your personality, so I wouldn't like for you to like it--does that make any sense?

      Happy April to you, too ;-)

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  17. I guess it's a good thing I don't like Vanilla Milkshakes to begin with LOL.

    I would love for Mr. Grinning Skull to come to my home. He would have a place of honor right next to my Elphaba. He is so a he, because Elphaba has left a flower by his skull in honor of him, to show how much she apreciates his sacrafice.

    I follow/read Pagan Culture because I learn something knew with each entry either about your life and world or about the world of litterature. To me learning, and continuing to learn is the most important thing in the world, keeps ones mind open. Thank you for helping keep mine open.

    Hugs
    Caroline

    I added my entry for today to the linky list but here is a direct link
    http://cmoh.blogspot.com/2013/04/beautiful-darkness-by-kami-garcia.html

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I'm not into vanilla either, I'm more a dulce de leche kind of girl.

      I think Elphie would LOVE that kind of company. She might try to figure out the cause behind the grin, and they might drive each other nuts.

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  18. Loved it! Mm mmm vanilla flavored mouse skeleton! I think I would be tempted to barf all over my shoes too Lmao!

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    1. I roared when I read "vanilla flavored mouse skeleton" lol

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  19. Love the colors of the "Grinning Skull" and I really like the whimsy of the daisy next to it!

    My favorite piece from Shelle's Etsy Shop? "Hugs", it has so much warmth and love in it ... it makes you feel good just to sit and look at it.

    "Skeleton In His Milkshake" ... suffice it to say, I nearly upchucked myself! My stomach is nearly in my throat right now! Your written words really conjured up a smelly image for me! Wish I had a good April Fool's pun I could pull on you! 8P

    Why I follow/read Pagan Culture? Because I like it!

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    1. I love "Hugs" too! the little frog, the daisy in the little girl's hair, that smile... sweet!

      Well, it seems this little story has called upon the grossness. Yuck lol

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  20. I literally SAW that frothy white milkshake splash over those black leather shoes, skin and bones in the weirdest reunion imagined LOL!!! That grin on your skully giveaway makes me think you shared the joke with him before you posted ;) So happy to be a part of the party Magaly... Thanks for invite, and if you don't mind, I'll stick to the wine and maybe leave the finger snacks 'til later ;)

    ReplyDelete
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    1. You had to say "frothy" didn't you?! Now my stomach is doing all kinds of unpleasant things!

      And I totally agree, I believe that grin knew what was coming ;-)

      It is so good to have you, Shelle. The bit I like most about Pagan Culture is to show people what I enjoy, and your art is right at the top ;-)

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  21. Yucky, yucky about the milkshake!!! LOL!
    I love Shelle's painting and I WANT Shelle's painting ;o) To me, it is a Mr. Grinning Skull ;o) He is getting ready to "connect" up with his "Bone Girlfriend" ;o) That is why here is a daisy. It is a gift for her ;o)

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    1. If it makes you feel any better, I grossed myself out, too lol

      I see, he is on his way to she his other half! No wonder he looks so happy ;-)

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  22. I love Shelle's "Scent Of Flesh" vampire! I love the angle of the head and how the hair is flying up ;o)

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    1. "Scent of Flesh" seems to be popular. Is the hunger...

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  23. I know I already said this, but the skeleton in the milkshake was truly yucky! Actually, it kind of hit close to home, because my mom once found a half a mouse in a soup, at a restaurant we went to! We never went back!!! I felt so sorry for my mom!

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  24. Why do I follow you?? Because you are smart, fun, cute, and wicked ;o)

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Keep on saying that, I'll start walking around with pictures of myself to sign for people, you know?

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  25. Oh, I like you too ;o) Hugs ;o)

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    1. And I adore you, right back, my friend ;-)

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  26. Great story, Magaly. I gotta say Geoffrey must have great suction power.
    Your story reminds me of the question, Would you rather eat half a worm in an apple and discover it or find out you ate the whole worm after eating the apple?
    The painting is very cool. Would make a great conversation piece and an excellent Halloween decoration.

    I'm glad I'm getting to know you, Magaly. I'm always interested in meeting and making new friends.

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    1. Indeed, I'm more of I rather see the warm as soon as possible kind of girl. And yes, Mr. Grinning Skull would certainly be an ice breaker...

      I'm glad we are getting to know each other, too. I enjoyed the tone of your writing, the scientific tone...

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  27. The pink is really intense aroudn the skull. Its quite dainty on some level.
    I want it because I'm redoing my laundry room and turning it into an altar room and I would love to display it proudly within my new comfort zone.

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    1. I'm so jealous, and I can't wait to see your altar room. I bet you are having a lot of fun getting it exactly how you want it.

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  28. Happy Blogiversary, Darling Mags!
    Your Birthday is soon, too....yes?

    Mine is the 14th! Turning 40! So excited!
    I was looking forward to going to an ice cream parlor to celebrate...but thoughts of mouse skeletons might haunt me with every sip ;P

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    1. I will be 36 on the April 5th, maybe we can celebrate in between. And I'm going to eat some ice cream even if skeletons are dancing on it lol

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  29. I'm afraid I'm not a vanilla gal, but I love the vibrant colors in this beauty. Very nicely drawn and colored.

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    1. Shelle and vibrant are nearly interchangeable ;-)

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  30. I love and want Ms. or Mr. Grinning Skull because for starters, it is a wonderful piece of art. Second, can a girl ever have too much macabre in her life? ;-)

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    1. I understand your "starters" and say, "Of course not!" to your question ;-)

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  31. I love the 60's inspired Teen Angel on Shelle's etsy. She has a lovely expression mixed with mischief and innocence. Hmmm...reminds me of a certain someone. ;-)

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    1. I think you've pointed out one of the many things I love about Shelle's art: "mischief and innocence."

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  32. Your story??? LMAO!!! Oh you wicked love, EEEEWWWWWW! It made me cringe, made my stomach turn just a bit, and of course I couldn't stop reading it. You are the master story teller. Mina

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  33. I read Pagan Culture because it opens my mind for contemplation and I ADORE the beautiful witch who pours her love into it. Happy 4th Blogovesary sweetie! Mina

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    1. Knowing you are reading, it would be impossible not to let it all out, my Mina ;-)

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  34. This is my first time reading Pagan Culture...and I'm HOOKED!! I love finding new and wonderful and insightful things to read to help me on my journey! I would love to have the painting set up near my altar. I want to sit and meditate on the knowledge hidden in those deep dark eyes. What things has she seen? What things has she known?
    My favorite painting from Sunshine Shelle is 'Ixchel' Mayan Rainbow Goddess.

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    1. Well, after seeing Shelle's work, I'm sure you've realized this little skully will share all kinds of things while you meditate. She might even sing ;-)

      Welcome to Pagan Culture!

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  35. I want Ms./Mr. Grinning Skull because she/he/it looks very relaxed.

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    1. Relaxed and so very cool ;-)

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  36. I like the Aceo Frida - 'Frida definitely liked her new Princess buns' - original art.

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  37. I thought "The Skeleton in His Milkshake" was very interesting!

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  38. I follow/read Pagan Culture because I like its creativity and connection to nature.

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  39. Hello everyone! I would like to have Mr. or Ms. Grinning Skull because.... Well.... who wouldn't want a happy skull picture hanging somewhere? If this skull can be happy with the afterlife, maybe it means we have something to look forward to, right? The colors are vibrant, and it would definitely make for a great centerpiece and conversation starter.

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    1. I totally agree! You've think people would be less scared of skulls; really, aren't they smiling all the time? lol

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  40. I want her because she reminds me of home and Dia De Los Muertos. Also, I have seen SunshineShelle's work many a time, and cannot, under any circumstances, pick a favorite. She is an amazing artist!!

    \IiiI

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    1. I can't blame you for not being able to pick a favorite. I haven't seen a piece by Shelle that I haven't wanted to own and cherish!

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  41. it would fit perfect in my rooms decor

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