Sorry, but We Don’t Fit


One of the things I love most about All Hallow’s Eve, Halloween, Samhain, El Dia de los Muertos... is that everybody parties together. Fine, a few people don’t, but they are generally boring anyway, which means that they don’t count. The individuals I speak of embrace diversity to the limits and love to learn from others. They are very similar to most of the friends I’ve made in the blog world: we care little about our differences; we usually focus on sharing, learning, and having fun. 

With that thought in mind, when I started blogging, I contacted a lady whose writing I had been following for a few months, and asked if I could guest post at her blog. She said that my topic didn’t fit her audience—she blogs about interfaith and interracial issues. I told her I understood, and apologized for my blunder. How dare I think that the interfaith and interracial issues we discuss at Pagan Culture have anything to do with, um… the interfaith and interracial issues she discusses at her blog?

She emailed me last week, saying, “I’m the author of an interfaith and interracial issues blog, and would love to have you as a guest blogger. I think we can benefit each other and our aims by interacting…” After a long, fun and productive Facebook discussion, with a bunch of Wicked Darlings, I chose to dig out the three-year-old message—Gmail archival system rocks!—and replied, “I once asked you for the same, and you said you didn’t think my content and yours matched. Care to share what has changed since? I’m curious. Thanks ;-)”

Her response? Well… it included phrases like she “know[s] about SEO” and she has “the experience and [I] have the followers.”

I wanted to hurl.

For a moment, I wished I had gone with my initial instinct, and sent her an email saying, sorry, but we don’t fit. I mean, this lady doesn’t even follow Pagan Culture. But I’m glad I contacted her and asked instead. Not because I think that what I wanted to say first was wrong—it was an honest reaction—but if I had just gone for the snark to the heart, I would have never known just how on point my witchy instincts were. I love learning things about moi, you know?

But that is the ugly, ridiculous, and unimportant past. The future has rosemary hair, arms full of blooms, and is all about autumn. Yes, I joined another challenge—I’m a mingler, remember? Actually, I almost didn’t participate in Nature Photography. I couldn’t fit it on my calendar, but the lovely Satakieli emailed me and gave me choices. And I’m glad she did, for I really wanted you to meet this fellow…
This week’s them is Green/Journey. I went green. I took several shots—some with better light—but I love this one best. There is something about the Buddha-like look of the frog that makes me happy. And I love the shadows, too, and how the rosemary growing out of it looks like a funky hairdo.

And because I’m in a total All Hallow’s Eve state of mind, I also joined A Fanciful Twist’s 5th Annual Halloween Party. I’m talking “black lipstick covered in fairy dust,” “wicked mayhem,” and “sparkles oozing out of my pores.” Does Vanessa know how to get a party started or what? 
Am I seeing things, or does this owl look a bit like the frog?
This year, my Wicked Luvs, let’s show the world what The Witches’ Halloween is all about. Let’s cross barriers, lift veils, walk barefoot on mystery, and dance holding hands and cackling in the in-between!
***

. . . because real Witches like to share, to help, to mingle… but they won’t be anyone’s bitch 

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68 comments:

  1. New follower here. This post caught my eye because, well let's face it, I'm addicted to frogs. :() But it gave me a chuckle. It's great sending words back were they came from

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    1. Welcome, Padhopper. I'm quite enchanted by frogs, too. How can one not love something that pretty? And the message of transformation they send?

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  2. Witch not Bitch!!! Now there's a catchy motto :D....and I don't know what SEO stand for, but then I'm not that experienced lol :D XXX

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    1. Search Engine Optimisation = getting high ranking on Google (yeah, I know there are other search engines out there, but who uses them?)

      So the higher the ranking, the more views, the more money (if you're in some add programs or whatever.)

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    2. As WitchyDiary explained, the lady seems to be a collector of people (hits), hence the me not being anyone's bitch. So... she is so interested in discussing the issues that we discuss (not!) that she is willing to insult me in order to get a few of my Wicked Darlings to come over and visit. I don't understand why she would think that the reason why I don't have adds on Pagan Culture is because I don't know better... it makes me want to poke her in the eyeball ;-)

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  3. You so rock, Magaly. :)
    And she wanted to steal your followers and hits, nice - not.
    Screw her!

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    1. Well thank you, my friend. And screw her, indeed. I guess, in her eyes, I make a very nice step stool. She should have taken a better look.

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  4. "...real Witches like to share, to help, to mingle… but they won’t be anyone’s bitch" LOVE it! Reminds me of a similar experience recently with an over-ambitious author. I am glad you asked her what changed, and that your Witchy instincts were verified. Let's all poke her in the eye with a pointy stick, then dance holding hands while cackling like mad. Hugs!

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    1. I like your eye-poking plan, and the dancing and the cackling. I better find my special stick. It has bullshit repellent on the pointed end ;-)

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    2. I've got my eye poking stick and dancing shoes ready to go!

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  5. Oh so now I see what she wanted....now that you have a lot of followers and wanted to just harvest some of those for herself eh? Ugh. Your comments on FB ( I was there, lurking lol ) made me feel that she had already tripped your radar somehow, and as you said, it is always nice when our instincts are proven right, even if the outcome is not what we expect.

    Also...that FROG!!! I LOVE IT! As soon as I saw it I wanted it for my very own...yes...that means I am staring lustily at your frog, *wiggles eyebrows* and I said to myself before I scrolled down, "Oh look, it has rosemary HAIR!" ( Rosemary is one of my favorite scents in the world lol )


    Your frog ( Does it have a name? )and that Owl ( which is also awesome, and owls are a favorite animal of mine ) do resemble each other. They are both funky and awesome.

    Thanks for the follow up, talking about this...I was wondering what became of it!

    P.S. Reading your comment about you being a step stool....I think you would make a very nice step stool, in the way that you help deserving and non-asshatish people from time to time, giving them a "step up"...but you should be a wicked step stool as well, so when someone such as the woman you described tries to place her foot on your back, spikes shoot up from under her foot and impale her and cause pain for the undeserving. Like something out of one of the SAW movies. That would be an awesome step stool...nice and helpful when needed, and bloody and painful when taken advantage of....

    Um...sorry...I am still feeling a little brutal over someone who ticked me off Tuesday. *Ahem*

    *Winks*

    Love and hugs!

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    1. I guess you are right, I don't mind giving by back so that someone who needs a boots can step on it. I'm sure they will turn around and reach for the top of the wall and help me up, too. But this woman is ridiculous, isn't she?

      In all originality I stared calling the frog Rosemary Frog, to distinguish it from another rosemary plant I have growing in a pot, and it stuck.

      Don't apologize for the dark and bloody imagery. It made me grin ;-)

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  6. I <3 this post so much!! I have a frog pot that would make a perfect companion to yours :)
    Like Bella, I'm still feeling a little snarky, so I'll keep comments on the step-stool to myself ;)
    I love you, Magaly!

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    1. Maybe they can start a long distance relationship *wink, wink*

      I understand snarky. I'm sure you'll share later, right? Then again, it is difficult to deal with a world full of people and not have snarky days... or weeks ;-)

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  7. Your frog ROCKS!!!!! And yes the owl has a striking resemblance,lol!!!Deb

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    1. Well gracias ;-)

      I thought they looked similar. There is something about their expressions and their colors.

      By the way, when I first saw the frog, I thought of your work ;-)

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  8. I'm a bitchy Witch...is that bad lol? Okay, I will be the dumb one here, but what is SEO? Love your frog...would make an amazing tattoo one day :). And, this female person is not cool at all, trying to ride your coattails. Sad sad little woman lol.

    \IiiI

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    1. It would be such a colorful tattoo! I would love it. And yes, that lady is no lady at all...

      (SEO or Search Engine Optimization (getting people to visit your site, so that it will rank high on Google). It's a wonderful thing for those trying to sale ads... and I guess for exposure in general.

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  9. That's an interesting answer you got. :) It's always a good thing to go the diplomatic way just in case the answer makes sense. :))

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    1. Indeed. I've been wrong many times and it doesn't feel all the awesome. But seriously, I was not expecting her answer at all.

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    1. The frog's grinning, right now ;-)

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  11. Love the Rosemary Frog! He looks like he's thinking about the Hallowed Evening too!! I'm very disappointed in the response that you received from the woman who had contacted you, but I love the fact that you let it go and moved on!!

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    1. I was disappointed and surprised. I suspected she was looking for readers, but aren't we all? What I didn't expect were her reasons. And yes, moving on was best.

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  12. Some people just have no shame!! Very halloweeny the step stool thing lol!
    Brightest blessings!

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    1. Indeed. The meaning must be somewhere spending time with their common sense. I hope they find it one day, and just look for it, and stop trying to make others feel silly.

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  13. I would think that a person so well-versed in SEO would see that her 'experience' isn't of much interest if you are the one with the followers. I would say 'silly bitch', but I don't think she has enough independence of spirit to be a bitch, so I'll finish with 'silly child'.

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    1. You know, dear, I'm always amazed by the way in which people insist on ignoring the obvious. Every time I get an email from someone who has less than a couple of hundred followers "giving me tips" on how to increase my following, I just blink and wonder if they would be interested in a bridge I have for sale.

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  14. Enjoyed the story and really enjoying the comments keeping a smile on my face.. :)

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    1. As long as that smile stays ;-)

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  15. Hey wise one....spot on again. As far as screw her.....oh let's leave that to some other unfortunate one...it's not our thing. She seems to have screwed herself. tee hee. What a maroon....like they say.
    Hey frog has some attitude going on with it's wild and wonderful rosemary do. Love it.
    Yeah for the witchy team, insight and a side order of kick butt to go.
    Oma Linda

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    1. Ha! You made me laugh so hard, Oma Linda. You are right, why should anyone do her the favor? lol

      A side order of kick butt with extra boot ;-)

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  16. Whew! Snarky-ism seems to be making the rounds this week in the blog-o-sphere. Where do these people crawl out from?
    Anyway, LOVE the frog! Have fun with your Halloween at Vanessa's post!

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    1. I know! It's an epidemic. I haven't seen this much activity (of the snarky kind) in a long time. I wonder what's going on. Maybe the web needs a cleansing.

      And I plan to have a glittery blast at Vanessa's party!

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  17. Very, very, very cool. Of course, I love the frog!

    Cheers!

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  18. I'm very glad you asked, Magaly. I think asking is important before you judge - even if your witchy-intuition knows what the answer will likely be. Always good to let people speak for themselves. She showed her true colors though.

    I LOVE the frog! And rosemary hair is the best, because it's handsome, smells good and tastes wonderful!

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    1. Nothing sweeter than a fellow with edible hair lol

      Asking is always best, even if just for verification. It is hard to remember that sometimes, but when I do, I try ;-)

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  19. Sometimes it's so hard to shove that snark in a closet, but it's oh-so worth it when your intuition is validated. It's always better to let them dig their own holes, though I don't mind handing them a shovel. *grins*

    Love the frog and that you've taken on yet another challenge! I keep wanting to and then calculating the hours in my day and going.. nope. No way. So I'll love vicariously through you dear!

    P.S. I saw your comment on pen names at Kallan's blog.. you're right about your name. When Etsy sent me your mailing address the first time I was like 'WHO? Is that an imposter??' *clicks on photo* 'Nope, I know that ginormous smile anywhere.' ;-)

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    1. *live vicariously through you. Haha, don't want my dude being jealous if I were to start loving through you. Lmao.

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    2. There are times that tongue-biting is the only option. That or smacking someone silly, and I'm pretty sure the latter is illegal...

      You could "love vicariously through" me lol

      It is so hilarious when I've been communicating with someone via email, and then we speak on the phone. I have a peculiar accent, which you can always identify as Hispanic, but definitely as non-American. So when I speak to them for the first time, they stay quite for a while. Eventually they will say something like, "I was expecting someone Irish." Oh my, and their faces when they meet me lol

      So Guerrero will be ;-)

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  20. At least her answer was honest? I don't know.....seems like her lack of new Followers could come from her "way" of collaborating?

    You are authentic, Miss Magaly...I would love to hear your speaking voice.....all that is you gathered in your throat and breathed out into the universe :)

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    1. My goodness, Cameron, I'm pretty sure I stopped breathing for some long seconds. Your words are full of energy--completely organic. I have a feeling I will have a wonderful day today, and it will be all your fault ;-)0000

      About the lady, well, she used to have a very nice blog. She used to post about dating, raising children, going to family functions and everything done between mixed races and faiths. It was quite interesting, but a few months into 2010 it started changing and she began to post more about blogging. I'm not sure what happened.

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  21. Ah, the good old "blog follower poaching" thing. I wonder if it has occurred to this lady that perhaps she doesn't have gobs of hits because no one finds anything in her content worth hitting? The arrogance of the "I know the SEO and have the experience, you have the followers" part floors me.

    "Some people's children......"

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    1. Yep, some people's children leave the home without understanding the meaning of respect. They don't get the luxury of having their parents drill bits of reality into their heads, a little at the time, so it is likely that they will find someone who shoves it down their eyes. Or through the eye sockets--it's almost Halloween, after all ;-)

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  22. ...thanks google...for hanging onto all the ancient stuff...so you could toss it back in her lap. ha. chances are, she wouldn't gain too many followers...but YOU prob would...if you were a guest writer at hers...

    anyway...LOVE your froggie with the cool rosemary hair-do!!
    i'll have to go check out that Nature Photo link!! thnx!

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    1. You know, as much as I bitch about Blogger being bipolar and all, I always treat the old boy like one of those family members who drives you insane but you love to death. The one that comes up with the crazy schemes, you know? But that is always around when you REALLY need her/him.

      I think you might like the Nature Photography challenge. I'm sure you have all the pics already ;-)

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  23. I dare anyone to NOT feel happy when looking at that frog :) And, you're a better person than I am...I wouldn't have been as polite to that other blogger. Thanks for your kindness at my place!

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    1. I've gotten practice both ways: incredible people who want to share interesting ideas (learn from each other), and the occasional tool who was born knowing everything. The latter usually gets what he/she deserves, but encounters with the former gives me strength to be polite (almost).

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  24. You're so right about the lovely frog, there is something quite calm and buddha-like about him and he's perfect for this week's prompt.

    Thanks so much for taking part in the Nurture Photography Fall challenge this week, I hope you'll be able to join us again in a few of the other weeks!

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    1. Thanks for hosting. And for encouraging me to stay. I truly appreciate it. I love participating on everything, but many times people put so many restrictions on their events that it is impossible.

      I can't wait to read your tips, and see if I can capture some of photo goodness ;-)

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  25. Hello, Dear! Love the frog! I've come to your lovely blog from Vanessa's Halloween Party blog roll...
    It's so nice to "meet" you! ♥♥
    I'm looking forward to the celebration! (Now following you, as well!)
    Hugs,
    Anne

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    1. Greetings, and welcome, Anne. I'm sooo excited about the Halloween party. Vanessa is always putting together such fun events. I shall go and enjoy your sparkle when the day arrives. I will stop by and haunt you in a bit ;-)

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  26. I love the Frog.. He looks very "unamused" in a way. Should've sent that picture with a little blurb bubble saying "Sorry. We don't fit" to the Know It All. And if she did have the "experience" then she would know better than to be such an arrogant ass with whatever assumption was floating around in her empty head... I guess there is no shortage of people like that in the real world or blogging world.. You are awesome for handling it the way you did.

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    1. I think that every now and then people get to the point when they are so full of their own crap that reality can't leak through the nastiness. It's pretty sad, and it stinks.

      I love the frog-message idea lol

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  27. I am happy Gina, asked what SEO was, because I didn't know either! Your frog rocks! And, yes, it does look like the owl! I am for holding hands and dancing the night away ;o)

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    1. They both look like they won't bother with anything that is not exactly what they want lol. I love their eyes and their funkiness.

      And about Gina, that friend of ours ALWAYS asks the right questions. She's quite the wise one ;-)

      *Dancing with you!*

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  28. I think you handled that situation in a very classy way, it would be too easy to be snarky/sarcastic. I know I would have been tempted,lol!
    how funny that she now needs you, perhaps her blog is faltering because she is no longer talking about things people want to hear, and is more concerned with, say...SEO?
    I'm lovin the colorful mr. Froggy, and bet he smells pretty :-)
    have a great weekend girl!

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    1. He smells delicious! And I know he looks grumpy, but he is always happy to donate his hair for a yummy meal or a cleansing ritual. Today, his spiky green mane joined a couple of eggs in an omelet ;-)

      You hit the nail dead center. She has lost so many followers, and I think that it has to do with the fact that it looks like she lost her initial purpose.

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  29. Person is still an idiot but that frog ROCKS!

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    1. Amanda, you made me roar. Stop doing that, it's way too early lol

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  30. Bwahahahaha! I am so glad you had the last say and may I add...you rule. That's it in a nutshell. ;-)

    I love your frog with the rosemary hair. He makes me smile from head to toe, and may I add that your words, "Let’s cross barriers, lift veils, walk barefoot on mystery, and dance holding hands and cackling in the in-between!" are music to my soul. How blessed we all are to have the gift of Magaly.

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    1. I can hear your laughter and that warms my heart. You know, I wonder if she read this post. And if she did, can she now understand that we read each other not because we are looking for web-presence, but because it is fun and we like what comes out of each others' mouth?

      Your music is in my soul, my Mina ;-)

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  31. I always find your sharing so insightful ~ I'm just glad you're 'you', we need more in this world!
    It's great when can fit things in, isn't it!? Enjoy your weekend!
    ♥Sharon

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    1. I'm happy to be me, too. It seems that doing so keeps my To Blog List always full. Thanks for the kind words, Sharon, you are a darling.

      And yes, it's one of the things I LOVE about blog parties/challenges and such. They allow us to use our own things to relate to others. That's what diversity is all about ;-)

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  32. love your frog with its rosemary hair! love the blooms its holding too.

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    1. Rosemary hair seems to be in these days. And everything tastes better when presented with arms full of edible flowers ;-)

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