Dee


The first time I heard Dee laugh, I told myself that the wings of certain faeries must take the shape of dark and delicious cackles. I was sitting at a writing workshop reading a story about a little girl who smashed her mother’s face with a meat mallet. Although the mother had deserved the savagery, many listeners could barely see me through the disapproval spilling out of their eyeballs. I shrugged, continued reading, and once done, I turned around and located the recent torrent of laughter.

There were still laughing tears in her eyes. She was smiling and pointing at me. Since that day, I’ve always thought Dee has one of the most beautiful smiles in the universe. One of those loud grins that make others want to join in and celebrate the miracle of just sharing the same world with the source of so much awesomeness.

If you had asked me that day, I would have told you that Dee was the happiest person alive. That I was sure everyone liked her, felt her warmth, was as amazed as I was by her jubilance, and most of all, that she loved everything she was.

But that is not the case…

Dee’s beauty is shrouded by a mother with the maternal sense of a petri dish, a sibling with a violent swing, a stranger who knifed her for a pound of cheap coffee, former lovers who pounded her flesh and bled her soul until she screamed for mercy they enjoyed denying… after all that, most might think that Dee is bitter and hopeless, but they would be wrong. She is bright, giving, friendly, and happy around those willing to entice her to sparkle.

When I planned All Hallow’s Grim: The Darker Side of Faerie, my intension was to share the story of a water witch who lured criminals into her New York City apartment in order to feed on their flesh. But for some reason, every time I was about to post the short story, my friend Dee would come to my mind. No, I don’t think she would feed on criminals—their flesh is probably too tough, anyway—I thought about her because I feel she is one of those beings made ugly by a society that refuses to see beauty in hearts that have been trampled by circumstances, but still beat.

She has gone through so much and then a little more… in her three decades of life, Dee has reasons to be moody, to glare at the world without provocation, to walk at the edge of society (and close family), and no reason at all to allow anyone into her heart. Yet, she does. And she loves her friends well and completely.

I had to write this before understanding why a short story about a murderous water witch just wouldn’t do. The fictitious tale is thrilling and a little bloody, so of course I will share it eventually, but today I needed to focus my energy on a single wish: I wish, I wish, I wish for my friend Dee to shrug out of society’s ugly coat, to spread her wings, and to look in the mirror until she can see just how much she truly sparkles.

I would love to share the miracle of Dee’s smile, but she doesn’t like to have her picture taken. But here is her foot—yes, her foot—mine is the one in pink and black, the sparkly pink belongs to the Little Princess, and Dee is in blue, black, grey and white. Now, I will ask you for something a bit, well, strange… close your eyes, channel the face of the most beautiful person in your heart, smile at their thought-formed-image, and then begin your comment to this post with “Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…”
Then, my Wicked Luvs, fly over to the All Hallow’s Grim: The Darker Side of Faerie original party post and leave the link to your entry. Only links left there will be added to the archive list. 
And, of course, there is a giveaway...

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60 comments:

  1. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…or, with my own eyes (for I trust Magalys' judgement in such matters. so I know that you must, indeed, be a Magical Creature Dee).

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    1. She is extra magical. I pray for the day when she can see this as clear as those who get to view her from the outside ;-)

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  2. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…
    I know this world is a hard and horrible place. But it also has specks and spots of true beauty, and YOU are one of them! Hold on, hold on to love, to the things that lift your spirits, and to the people who care about you - and stick it to anyone who doesn't!

    And to Magaly: What a lovely gift. What a lovely friend you are. I love your writing.

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    1. I’m all about “sticking it to those who don’t care” about the ones who deserve it. So you’ve put a smile on my face.

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  3. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish I could see you sparkle through Magaly's eyes! ...and I know we will, in the not too distant future :D You have a truly beautiful soul, and you have the strength of a thousand angels at your back. Every time you smile, you drive evil into the deepest recess's of history, draining it's power to harm others. You are the embodiment of Love and Hope, and I am sure Magaly will help you remember that when you need a jolt of energy :D XXX

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    1. I rejoice at the thought of every smile driving evil to the nasty hole it came from. It makes me feel that my million watts grin has destroyed a lot of nasties ;-)

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  4. Dee: I wish for you the gift of other site. That way you could see what a true beauty you are to Magaly and enjoy what should be life with not constraints or limitations....Blessings, Oma LInda

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    1. I think if you and Dee get the chance to meet each other, you'll find yourself with another adopted daughter. She is that special, Oma.

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  5. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes… to see you bloom into a butterfly with steel wings. For to live through adversity one must develop a thick skin. I know how it feels always being battered and bruised by the ones you love. It's why I am anti-social in the real world. However on the net it's different. I make friends online without fear. They mean the world to me! Magaly being one of them. :) But if life should take an ugly turn and one of my friends harms me, it's always easy to walk away. This is how I have protected myself. It's also why I blog. Blogging is my way to share who and what I am without fear. Fly free little butterfly. Know that there are people in the world who would love to get to know you and see you for the beautiful creature the Lord and Lady created.

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    1. I love what you've said. I've heard so many say that people use the internet to hide. I like the idea of this medium being a shield. There are times when offering our hearts face-to-face is just to dangerous. It is nice to have the control/power to back away if we choose.

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  6. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish I could see you sparkle through Magaly's eyes. . .
    Have you ever wondered just how Magaly can write about gore and macabre things? It is because she also knows the good and wonderful side of life. And you, dear Dee, represent that good and wonderment - showing her, and others around you, that seeds of evil do not have to grow misery and hate.

    Thank you, Dee for the magnificent, positive influence you are to anyone who comes to know you. I love how you have touched Magaly's world. And, today, you have touched my world, too.

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    1. Life is all about balance, isn't it? Light would never shine without darkness, so we just need to let our brightness shine in order to see that the darkness is not as bad as some might make it to be. At least when we have someone's hand to hold.

      You touch me every day, Eliora. In a platonic way, of course *cough, cough*

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  7. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes. Don't let the evil of this world tear you apart. We are sisters here, and we want to lift you up and take you from that place that is holding your wings down and darkening the shine and light that is waiting to be released inside of you. I can see that you are a truly beautiful woman with a soul that sparkles like diamonds and rubies in the sun. Share that with this world, and the darkness will disappear.

    Much love to you my sweet \IiiI

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    1. You tell her, my Zombie Goddess. No one can give better guidance, than she who has been there, done that, and stuck the t-shirt down an idiot's throat ;-)

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  8. I saw beauty. I saw a warrior's spirit. I saw the impossible beauty of a single perfect white rose before blooming. I saw heroism with triumph shining behind its eyes. I see you Dee

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    1. Kestrel, my heart is warm and my smile growing. Thanks for seeing how bright my Dee shines ;-)

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  9. Betty Trevino10/25/2012

    “Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…” But what I really want for you is to see yourself through YOUR OWN EYES! Magaly's vision of you, our vision of you, is 20/20. But you've accepted an image of yourself imposed upon you by a blind person. Anyone who can't see your innate decency, beauty, kindness, and worth is the worst kind of blind-one that refuses to see. Use us, Magaly, anyone who shows you a glimpse of kindness as if we were lenses. Let our positive energy clear your sight and make you see what is really there. Can you try to see yourself as we do? Worthy of love, affection and respect. Can you close your eyes to the awful lies told by weaker, smaller people who were blinded with envy by your light? Let this be the first step before a mirror that reflects your true self-the self that sparkles in Magaly's eyes.

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    1. I have a feeling that she will see all she has to, especially if we give her time to see things for herself. But we can always nudge her that way...

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  10. “Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…
    That you are a beautiful soul.

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  11. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…for to be embraced by a Witch of such high character, overwhelming passion and fierce loyalty is special....and a friendship that could work magic within that awesome heart of yours :)

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    1. She is impossible not to embrace Cameron. I don't get the people who have mistreated it, at least not at first. But then I remember that ugly always wants to step on beautiful to see if it can make the latter as worthless as itself. Sad.

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  12. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly's eyes... and through mine. She described your strength and your glowing colors of beauty in such a way, I feel it in my heart.
    I see you, sister of beauty, sister of strength, sister of witches, sister of love. Shine.

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    1. Life, the good and the bad, is easier to enjoy or fight, when we walk together as sisters.

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  13. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes… no one has the power to dim your Light. You possess such strength, love, and beauty within you that no darkness can blot it out. Let your Light shine dear Dee, let it shine and burn away any negativity that may threaten your happiness. You are a goddess, own your power; claim it now, and SHINE! I wish you much love and happiness <3

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    1. "no one has the power to dim your Light..." When I finish replying to the gazillion of emails and messages crowding my inbox, I shall call Dee and say those words to her. And I will say them to myself, too. Always.

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  14. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…the world is what we make it, and it sounds as if some part of you understands that. That's why you still sparkle, and others can see that. But I get how it can be hard, our society expects you to look a certain way and if you don't, then damn it, don't you dare shine. Well, screw them! This is your life, and you have beauty and laughter in you - let it out and let anyone else be damned. Now I'm going to try and take my own advice. :D

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    1. Screw them indeed. I swear that I just saw you shake your fist at society's stupidity, and I'm loving it.

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  15. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly's eyes... you sound like a wonderful person, and you must be since Magaly obviously loves you so much. I wish I could see your smile. :)

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    1. She is amazing. And I, too, wish you could see what happens to her face (and everything around her) when she smiles. I hope one of these days, she will share ;-)

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  16. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes. Wait, I just did! :-)

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    1. I bet it filled your house with the purest of glows!

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  17. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly's eyes! You are a strong, beautiful woman and I would love to see your pretty smile ;o)

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    1. Keep on telling her. Maybe that will tell her that I'm not the only one. Although, I'm quite selfish and I want to keep her smile to myself. But we all know that happiness is best when shared.

      P.S. Dee's smile reminds me of yours ;-)

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  18. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly's eyes!
    You are not alone in this world. There are more of the beaten and down-trodden than you may think. HOWEVER, many do not come through it with their head's held high. Seldom, does one come through it, without some cynicism or outright hatred in their hearts. It is the rare beauty that comes through it and SPARKLES!! I wish I knew you, somehow i think we would get along quite well :)

    You have a glorious friend in Magaly, let her help you out of your shell, or from behind your wall. All of us need to have photos to remind us of our loves, our laughter, our friends!
    Much love and light upon BOTH of you.
    Susan

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    1. Susan, right now, I wish I could hug you. You've shared so much truth. So many times we meet people that face life with a glare on their faces and we don't stop to wonder what put it there or what the mask represents. We should remember that sometimes the glare is just a shield. We should also celebrate those who smile on ;-)

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  19. “Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…” for in my own mind's eye I see the eyes of an old soul who has seen such incredible beauty in past lives that the horrors of this life can neither dim nor destroy the knowledge of love and giving deep within the core of your being. I see a flame burning through the dross, searing the ugliness, and emitting a light of acute clarity--a poor reflection of your inner self. I am awed.

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    1. I'm adding energy to your words, for what you see is what I've been seeing in her all those time. I bet that your insight will make her glow more ;-)

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  20. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…” I just know how special you are. You are special to the universe! You are special to the Great Spirit!
    Thanks for this post Magaly. It is an important one.

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    1. Thank you for recognizing it, Francie. I've always thought that the most important thoughts anyone can share are the ones used to show just how wonderful those around us really are.

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  21. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…
    you would see what she has shown all of us, your sisters in humanity. You would see an inspirational Being, a shining beacon of light that cuts through the darkness of cruelty and ignorance. You would see what Magaly has shown all of us. you would see you.

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    1. I love the idea of of having sisters in humanity, isn't that how it should be? I hope others feel the same way. We should collect some brothers, too, or the estrogen overload will kill us lol

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  22. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…

    I don't know you, and chances are we will never meet. But if Magaly says you are a special person, then I am sure she is right. Don't let anyone take that away from you. I don't know what your lesson in all of this is (there is always a lesson) - maybe you need to learn how to fight back, or maybe you need to learn how to walk away. Just don't let the others tell you you are ugly or worthless. Never ever let them win.

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    1. Walking away is such a hard thing to do, but having done it more than once, I can say that it is one of the best too.

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  23. One of the most beautiful smiles in the universe... I see it in my mind's eye. Dee you are beautiful, I see your huge smile now, and it is contagious... I wish, I wish, you accept you are perfect the way you are, feel the love sweet one, it is our flaws that make us unique, the weathering of adverse conditions that give us strength, embrace the good that is in your life now, because arseholes should not be allowed to destroy beautiful things... you are beautiful x

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    1. Arseholes should be kick right in the face and told just how bad they stink. I really wanted to use the word arseholes, so thank you.

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  24. Dee's story sounds too familiar...she is the luckiest of all to have you as a friend. with your compassion, love & support...i know Dee will see her own special sparkles through your eyes...and learn to let her own light shine through! sparkle on Dee!!

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    1. I think that the fact that the story is so common is what hurts most. I wish others could share their own experiences, too. Burdens are easier to share and defeat when the carrying is done by many shoulders.

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  25. “Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…” by shedding the old, worn-out skin of pain, degradation and insult that you have outgrown. Like the wise serpent, your eyes have clouded over in preparation for this shed, and as you push your way out into a new beginning, you see yourself reflected in Magaly's proud countenance. Welcome to your new world, Dee!!

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    1. Kallan, I love you so much. I'm writing these words in pretty paper, and placing them in a place I can see all the time. You rock!

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  26. Dee, I wish times three
    My advise you will heed

    Take the dagger
    Hold it tight
    Cut the harness that binds
    Instead take flight
    Let your dreams lead
    For you have the power to be free

    Your friend Magaly holds you dear
    Her wish is for your eyes to clear

    And like a fairy tale told
    Stand before a mirror
    Lift your chin and with
    Conviction bold

    Say Mirror Mirror
    I do avow
    That I’ll never again allow
    Myself or any other
    To dampen my shine
    Instead from here onward
    I will see with new eyes


    Don’t forget to love yourself, Dee. It’s important. Remember: Shine! Radiate your glow!

    P.S: I don’t really think you should sparkle, cause if you do then you’ll end up in a Twilight movie. Unless you want to be part of the Cullen family. Besides Edward already married Bella and things would just get confusing.

    But if you glow, you could be in Team Jacob and be an awesome wolf (and they’re all really hot!). Just saying… :o)

    Crazy lady signing off. (~.~)

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  27. Dee I don't wish you anything as currently god hates me and would probably just fuck with you to spite me.

    Instead, I will give you the same advice my mother gave me as a child, over and over.

    Fuck em Dee, fuck em all. If the world doesn't like that's just too god damned bad for them.

    And then she handed me a book of matches.

    Don't ask but good luck to you dear.

    If mags likes you then you must be special.

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    1. Militant Queer, you always made me a better person. Now, about them matches...

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  28. Best comments ever... much better than anything on TV... oh my, you all are awesome :)

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    1. Aren't they? I swear that the comments are the things I love most about blogging. Pagan Culture has the best Wicked Darlings, EVER!

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  29. Dee, how I wish, I wish, I wish you could see your sparkles through Magaly’s eyes…” for Magaly has the sight of all beautiful goodness in this world, the wisdom to do what needs done, and the heart to love you hard. You are both lucky to have found one another.

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    1. Mina, I can't wait for you and Dee to share some words. I've told her a lot about you. I shall email you, soon. For I know you will have much wisdom for her, just as you've always have for me. Hugs!

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  30. Dearest Magaly, thank you so much for loving me and supporting me. Every time I get closer to extinguishing my flame, I read all of these beautiful posts and try to hang on a bit longer.
    Dee

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    1. Dee, anyone who knows you and doesn't love you should be put in a straight jacket and thrown in a deep hole where their stupidity and blindness can only affect them. Okay, so maybe they should be talked to as well, but the straight jacket and the dark hole make a much better story ;-)

      I'm glad these comments help, my dear friend. And even more glad to read that you know how much you are loved.

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