Making friends is like plotting a story: I imagine the main character, the conflict and then work on everything else. When the new individual entering my life is a stranger to Witchcraft, the first conflict usually originates from their reaction to me being a Witch.
Recently, I met with a dark fiction writer who was looking for a new critique partner. He writes hard boiled horror, so I told him that maybe he wanted to find someone who was interested in detective fiction—it’s easier to critique a piece when one is interested in the genre and knows how it’s supposed to work.
He agreed, but asked if I wouldn’t mind reading his antagonist’s profile. His villain was a witch, and the writer had heard that I knew a lot about witches in fiction. I read the profile and suggested a few changes. He was extremely grateful, especially after I explained why a few of his character’s traits made no sense. For instance, his witch avoided churches because she didn’t want to burst into flames... but she wore a crucifix for protection against demons.
Somewhere near the end of our conversation, the writer said, “What got you interested in fiction about witches?”
“I’m a Witch,” I told him. “And you know what they say, write about you know.”
He gave me a strange look before he spoke. “That is so weird,” he said. “You are such a nice woman, and witch is such a nasty word.”
I stared at him for a long while, debating whether or not I should tell him that he wasn’t only ignorant but also an asshole.
Just when I had made up my mind, he interrupted my thoughts. “I hope you know I meant no offense,” he said.
“Of course you didn’t,” I told him. “I know all ignorant assholes have a hard time coming up with meaningful words.”
“That’s harsh,” he said.
“Yep,” I smiled. “And I meant every word.”
I can’t stand people who cling to the I meant no offense defense, when it’s obvious they want to insult. Words are too powerful to be used without meaning to.
|I found this ginormous gravity-defying tank at funnyjunk.|