I just endured the agony of ordering my textbooks for the fall semester. School starts on August 26th, so you can say that I ordered my books a bit late. But I have my reasons… I was waiting to see if a friend could hook me up with a few books, I also wanted to see if I could get a few really cheap used textbooks from other students. Who can blame me for wanting to save a few dollars? I mean, let us be honest here, the economy sucks “dish water”. I was going to say the economy sucks butt, but that wouldn’t be ladylike, so I said dish water instead of butt as you probably noticed. Oh, the italics show that it is just a thought, and thinking butt doesn’t really count. Every-freaking-body thinks butt sometimes! Right?
Anyway, back to the textbook ordering agony issue. I emailed all the vendor from whom I ordered my textbooks. This is the exact message I sent:
I just ordered textbooks X, Y and Z from your online store, and was very glad to find such a reasonable deal. I understand that you have a couple of days before you must ship them, but I would be eternally grateful if you would put them in the mail as soon as possible. My fall semester starts August 26th and I’m kind of a paranoid nerd who truly believes the world is going to end if I don’t have all my books on the first day of class. You are probably thinking “If you were so much of a ‘paranoid nerd’, and you worry so much about your education, then you would pay the extra money for the shipping”. And I don’t blame you if you are thinking that. I guess I should have added that my paranoid nerdy self is also mildly broke, and trying her best to save a buck.
Thanks in advance for your help and I hope you are having a glorious day.
My Wicked Darlings, I was hopeful. I’ve sold textbooks online, and whenever I gotten a personal email from a buyer, I've done all I could to accommodate their needs. But me, my delusional self, and I were in for a little surprise. This is the reply I got from the vendor:
Thank you for your email. Currently, your order is scheduled to ship 8/20 at 1:00PM Pacific Time, via standard mail (USPS media mail 4-14 business days). If you would like to discuss other shipping options with us (expedited for an extra charge), please give us a call at 1-800-000-0000. There is usually no wait when you call, and we're available to assist you Monday through Friday 8am to 5pm PST (unless the phone lines are busy).
We will hold your book until 1:00pm Pacific Time the following business day (8/21) to find out what you would like to do, then we will cancel your order unless we hear from you.
We look forward to hearing from you.
I went back and read my original message, just to make sure that I actually wrote what I thought I wrote. Read it. Read it again. Yep, I did tell them to ship as soon as possible and that I didn’t want to pay extra for expedited mail.
I considered getting angry, but I laughed instead. Loudly. I remembered that anger did little for me when it came to ordering books online. As a matter of fact, it just contributed to me getting Stripped by Marcia Colette about two months later than everybody else *Yes, this sentence made me giggle too*.
So I smiled and then emailed the bookseller and requested my textbooks to be shipped on 8/20/2010. Let us hope they don’t read this post and decide to send my textbooks next semester or on 8/20/2011 or some garbage of the sort. That would suck butt. Yes, screw ladylike writing.